Stoner metal should be played by ugly dudes for ugly dudes. I'm not saying that heterosex can never come into it -- gettin' down to Sky Valley is one of life's great pleasures, and I suppose Electric Wizard's smoking hot second guitarist Liz Buckingham must have found something seductive about the genre when she married bandmate Jus Oborn. Point is, the almighty fuzz riff is best pursued and appreciated when sex is a non-issue, and bliss is the main objective.
Brooklyn's Kings Destroy aren't anything much to look at, and the two songs on their debut 7" aren't much prettier, just a bunch plodding rhythms, Obsessed riffs and Steve Murphy's adenoidal singing voice. There's something really satisfying about how these dual guitars lock so tightly, maybe more tightly than is ideal for music this bong-tastic. Come to think of it, other than the chanted note halfway through "Medusa," the music here isn't all too weedy. Murphy sounds like he's toking the same weed as 1967 Ozzy. The others sound like they gave up drugs years ago. Totally pro performances, and a bright mix from Mike Moebius.
Then again, maybe the riffage is so economical and precisely played because a lot of these guys used to play meaty music in hardcore bands. Guitarists Carl Porcaro and Chris Skowronski were in NYHC legends Killing Time, Murphy was in Uppercut, and the rhythm section did time in Electric Frankenstein and Stanley. Listen hard, and you'll hear hardcore energy, shoehorned into stoner metal strictures. It's a little clean to connect, but these are just Kings Destroy's first two songs. Soak the band in bong resin for a millennium and they'll be considered classic. Or, just give the knobs over to Sanford Parker, as Kings Destroy are doing for their upcoming full-length debut. Same difference.
Kings Destroy donate a portion of all proceeds to the Brooklyn-based youth basketball team, the On Point Cyclones.